Corn water. Not-lying. The bi bi tri bi-athlon. These are but few of the inspired creations of Hamish Blake and Andy Lee, inventive genius not seen since Alexander Graham Bell’s first ‘ahoy’. Their segments smash through convention and embrace the absurd: a garden of earthly delights including ‘Random John’, ‘Am I Naked?’ and ‘Tell me someone I haven’t thought about for a while’, their comedy output is second to none. Rosie and Lana revisit some of their favourite Hamish and Andy moments.
Many of us have fantasized about our songwriting abilities, imagining that, if so inclined, we could produce music to rival the likes of Sia or Ed Sheeran. It was with this attitude that Hamish and Andy approached their task, taking inspiration from the simplest of objects to craft a song truly deserving of the term earworm.
“Everything is neat and practical, ‘cause that’s the way he likes it… but what if it wasn’t?” In this segment, callers try their best to upset Andy with their best, everyday examples of inefficiency and impracticality, while Hamish revels in his “fast-and-loose” lifestyle.
Operation Dry Tank
No one likes to be told what to do, even by a machine. Hamish and Andy take a roadtrip (down the freeway) to uncover the lies that cars tell us about our fuel levels…
A throwback to 2009 and Hamish and Andy’s early days, the duo take on the challenge of eating for free for one week. That means no buying, stealing or being given food and, instead, a lot of scavenging, a lot of free samples and eve some second-hand kids’ burgers.
Andy by Hamish
Perhaps my favourite Hamish and Andy saga began when Hamish convinced Andy to sign a blacked-out contract. Within just a few weeks, Hamish had carried out a covert photoshoot, conducted a mass wafting and even enlisted a celebrity fragrance ambassador to create Australia’s best-selling perfume.
How do you like them apples? Not at all, according the apple expert Brian, unless you’re tasting the delightful crunch of the mythical SweeTango. If you think you’re partial to a Golden Delicious, think again: there’s no room for those “commercialised pieces of garbage” apples in this orchard. The Appleist’s devotion to naming and shaming “crapples” and sharing his apple epiphany is nothing short of inspirational. I wish I was as passionate about anything as Brian is passionate about apples.
“Do you swear to smell the whole smell and nothing but the smell?” The boys go beyond the call of duty in the name of science. Hypothesis: Hamish’s body processes food so quickly that the scent of his lunch will be discernible in his flatulence. The Nobel Prize invitation must have got lost in the mail.
A simple story of a boy’s unconditional love for chips. Nuf said.
Salt and Pepper
Another scientific experiment worthy of a tip of the hat from Mr Nobel. In an attempt to sneeze with his eyes open, Andy allows Hamish to blow a straw-ful of pepper up his nose. Needless to say, it doesn’t end well. The glorious moment during the recovery mission in which Hamish points out that adding saline solution to the mix makes the contents of Andy’s nasal passage “salt and pepper” is golden… unless you’re Andy.
In perhaps the most selective of all H&A’s radio segments, the boys search for stories of coincidental vertical falls that defy physics. Personal favourites include someone losing their phone off a balcony only for it to slip into someone’s breast pocket below, and an avocado stone flying up out of its crater and landing straight back in. If you’re looking for incredible throws or pretty good drops, move along.
Check out some more of our favourites below, and tune in to their weekly podcast for more nuggets of hilarity.